Giving out the wrong message…

An archive of emails you wish you’d never sent, best forgotten office memos and crazy requests from offices around the world…

I want to read your private emails!

If the internet revolution has proved anything, it’s that not only will people do every naughty thing you can imagine and far worse besides, but also that they’re quite likely to boast about it afterwards. A simple equation involving the ease of use of electronic mail multiplied by the boredom of office workers around the globe ensures that these boasts can reach millions within hours.

Take Jo Moore for instance, the spin doctor for the New Labour government whose message on 11 September 2001 that “today is a good day to bury bad news” amazed the world. Or Claire Swire, a woman famous for nothing else but her enjoyment of the taste of something the Victorians used to refer to as “male discharage”.

I’m convinced, however, many of the best emails remain un-forwarded and unknown… Until now. That’s why I’m sending out the call to workers around the world to forward me the funniest emails they’ve received or sent – as well as the most regrettable. I’ll be diligently collecting and compiling them over the next few months – and hopefully laughing my arse off in the process.

Just fill in the comments section below the stories that follow, or send me an email.

To view the full email wall of shame, click here

In the year 2000, Claire Swire became an internet phenomenon, her email to a male acquaintance, Bradley Chait, informing him that his sperm tasted “yum”, reaching millions of email inboxes within hours of its initial sending. Click here to see how the story unfolded…

As a result of this infamous exchange, Bradley was disciplined by his superiors at Norton Rose and Claire was forced into hiding… Rather than learn from their misfortune, however, thousands since have simply followed their example.

Am I the worst boyfriend in the world?
When Trevor Luxton asked a few fellow employees at Credit Lyonnais the question “Am I the worst boyfriend in the world?” he could hardly have expected that within hours the whole world would be in a position to answer. Thanks to the power of the internet, however, that’s exactly what happened…
Click here to read more.

A grade ‘A’ Date
In 2002 Jacqueline Kim made the mistake of emailing her unusually materialistic assessment of her date (good kisser, nice car, needs to get a haircut and shower her with presents if he wants to keep her) to a few friends outside her office – some of whom promptly forwarded it on for the delight and amusement of a large proportion of the internet communit

To read the full email in all its capitalist glory, click here.

“5 down, 1,000,000,000 left to go…”
In May 2001, Peter Chung, a priapic recent Princetone graduate and a new employee of the Carlyle Group in South Korea sent an email about his numerous recent conquests back in New York. The rest is internet history – as was the unfortunate Mr Chung who soon found himself looking for a new job.
Click here to read more…

An All Time Low
On 10 am Thursday September 5, 2002, a New York office worker, Tripp Murray, sent a chatty email to Mary Callahan, a woman he’d recently taken on a date, asking if she intended to go to a Bon Jovi concert that night and if not suggesting himself as company.

He was surprised to receive a reply entitled All Time Low and starting “Ok first — here is the e-mail I received from Tripp, the new guy I met last week.” Then he was no doubt horrified as he went on to read Callahan explaining how easy this ‘Tripp’ would be to drain of money: “Since we have not slept together, he will of course be trying to impress me and will, therefore, do anything I ask.”

Click here to read more.
We were well and truly stuffed”
Finally, but certainly not least, a classic piece of newsroom sensitivity, send to this website by an anonymous donor with the following message:
“Whenever I want to remind myself why I left news reading, I only have to take a look at this. The bit I like best is ‘foot-in-the-door tactics are not our style’ (it was – totally) followed by the suggestion that we stake out neighbours instead.”
Click here to read more.


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